Friday, September 26, 2008

the end of everything

I stumbled upon a band's myspace page, and one of the entry of their blog caught my attention. its entitled "by the way, we broke up". yes its this small little band in Massachusetts, happen to broke up. where i seen quite a number of bands in the local scene broke up. this particular one actually makes me think.

"what if i end silent scenery one day?"

its been a year plus since i convert silentscenery into fullband mode, from simple 4 chords songs to well structured progressive songs, my effect pedals, from 3 pieces now became 7 pieces, from Squier Telecaster to now Epiphone SG (switching soon to Mosrite). we played more than 30 shows already, had an album out recently. we still have a long way to go. its hard to imagine that im gonna end this one day. no doubt, i'll still be doin music altho not under the name silentscenery.

isnt it funny how small little things in our life can grow into our skins and bones?

having a band is like having a life partner i guess.

by the way, the band that i mentioned, they werent well known, not a sucess, but they made decent music. to think about sucess, silentscenery is not an explosive hot item in the music scene, but we kinda made it to somewhere that almost 70% of bands in the current music scene cant be honest, im quite satisfied.

lately, i've let go of my usual frontman position in the band. i wont be handling as much things as i used to handle, im letting the rest pushing their limits in song writing, maybe one day, if i decided to leave, they can continue the legacy. and not just die. it'll be pretty funny/weird to watch a band that i formed playing without me :)

i started silentscenery 3 years ago. i went thru alot of things, wrote alot of songs about people, but only one them made it to silentscenery debut album.

the person who witnessed the starting point of silent scenery but never walk with us after that. a person who appear out of nowhere, stayed in my life for the shortest time, but left the deepest impact. i dont wanna sound like a sissy, but..

i long to speak to that person. i really do. i want to tell that person all the exciting & wonderful things that i've been thru in this past one and a half year. vice versa too

you saw me started something beautiful, i would like you to see the end someday. whats a story without an ending?


Wednesday, September 17, 2008

cant help it

when i look at this particular screenshot of joker from "dark knight" i cant help but to imagine that he speak english like a hokkien kampung dude. so i designed this. i dont care, its funny for me.


feelings are disturbing


im trapped in this dark space again. where there's uncertainty. it gotta happen to me didn't it? why must you come here again? what the fuck? go away. get the fuck away from here.

ah, at least something good happened today.

anwar is very likely going to be our new prime minister. let it happen.


Friday, September 12, 2008

this is what i called bullshit


the government has arrested Raja Petra Kamaruddin & Teresa Kok today under the Internal Security Act for allegedly being a threat to security, peace and public order.

First of all, RPK as a threat to National Security?
Is he? did people kill each other after reading RPK's Is he a terrorist? Any prove that shows he's going to organize a mass suicide or street protest? Eh, uncles, got or not?


so is he a threat to national security or a threat to corrupted VIPS?

Did Teresa Kok said she wanna ban Azan? Did she or not? She wasnt even involved in the petition on lower down the volume of the loudspeakers for the ceramah (religious talks)! Dude, lower down the volume for ceramah, not Azan! So, now Teresa Kok is detained under ISA for being accused (mark the word, ACCUSED)
involving in a non-existing petition to ban Azan.

this is fuckin bullshit. we malaysian, demand the government to release RPK & Teresa Kok this instant.

if they really did something wrong (which i dont think so), charge them, and send them to court, not detain them without trial. this is a big slap on the face to democracy. this is a total disgrace to malaysian justice system.

Free RPK & Teresa Kok. Now! Abolish ISA!



I've started to worry about some of my doings & plans for myself. well, i know trail and error are unavoidable scenario in life but the fear of making wrong decisions will always linger around your head.

i hate the feeling of being indecisive.

one morning you wake up telling yourself "alright, this is what im going to do" then the next morning you pull back and be like "whoa, wait a minute man".

lets give myself a dateline to rearrange my plans. ok, till end of this month.

PS: Yes

Thursday, September 11, 2008

im a strategist

Always, im this strategist, planner, motivator, propagandist. im somewhat better in assisting people towards success. wonder why. but helping people is an accomplishment to me so i never feel tired of doin it.

maybe its a gift, lets not complain.

smile. i like to see people smile, or better, laugh out loud. im attracted to this kinda aura in a person. its a positive aura that not everyone owned. therefore, i've always believe a person psycical outlook is a secondary asset, the aura of a person is the most important thing.

everyone should take note of this simple fact. smile bitches, smile!

end of discussion.

oh, ebee! farewell man! dont emo, im sure you'll be back just like Arnold in Terminator. ahaha.

oh shit, i need to get back to work.

kit kling klang
PS: i'll remind myself, yes i do.

Monday, September 8, 2008

saving, random, jealous, things

Aha! i thought since i wrote such a long entry last week, i should keep this going. with a blog title thats nice to be used as song title.

on my way driving back to my home after missing in action from my own house for 2 days plus, i told myself something.

"maybe you should do something totally selfless from now on, in order to make people happy, go, do something for people who meant something to you"

i dont know what others think about me as a person, basically i dont care what people think about me. but deep inside me, i know im a selfish fuck. no, seriously. thats how i see myself and i have been living with that for a long time. alright maybe not all the time i think. lets say 70% of the time.

okay, after 3 paragraphs you should be thinking, "haha, this fucker is emo". no im not. im just having some thoughts in my head.

i've lost the plot.

ahh, i can never express my stuff to people, even i know not much people gonna read this. i've always been secretive about my personal things, to a point i think i've kept too many things to myself. hell, i always say music is an expression, but i never obviously tell people any stories in my songs. only i know what does the song mean. anyone out there, if i've ever told you my song meaning, sorry, i lied to you 50%.

so now, in order to be honest, i'll keep this journal going in order to support an operation called "saving random jealous things".

sorry, it wont be fun if i tell you the meaning of "saving random jealous things" isnt it? :) all i can say is, this operation is an act of selflessness.

oh yeah, about ebee, you're the keeper of things i said that night (which i still dont know what is it). not necessary to reveal it to me. you keep it. until you publish your journal. remember in the car you said "lets pretend that im back in malaysia". yes, indeed i will. you belong here, in a way, hhmm.. in many ways. Ahah. our december trip is my main aim now. it WILL happen. dont worry, go back, give a some hugs to everyone there, then eventually you'll found yourself back here.

monday is the worst day of the week, but, even thats okay, its cos of that i've got the money to enjoy myself and use the money to take care of people, now and future.


o: hahaha, you dont even know it yourself! you havent realise!
k: i know now, i think i do.

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

a rare tuesday blue

aha.this is quite a jump from my previous post.

Having a rare Tuesday blue after a long weekend. not just a long weekend. a fun one i had. to think of it. the fun actually started on Thursday where i see for the first time, Silent Scenery dominated a show in Laundry bar, then followed by a weird/funny acoustic show we played at a place that looks like a brothel on Friday night, that's not all, the main course of this joke is, there were no crowd! Somehow we don't feel demotivated or sad about it, in fact i think at some point, we enjoyed playing our set. ahaha. i also made it to watch deepset launch their album at wondermilk, met eb, had a drink and an indo mee with telor mata kerbau with her.

Saturday was the heavy one. i was supposed to attend rantai merdeka event at jaya one but i woke up late, and scrapped the plan after i receive a call from eb asking me to join tthe rest to celebratie merdeka at the curve. so i went to curve to sorta celebrate malaysia independence day. with jz, jn, eb, fu and ek. we later head back to jz & jn's house to have our "after party" :)

i made used of my jagermeister at last
got wasted with jz, jn, fu and eb is fun, especially jz (fire starter partner) . altho eb didnt drown, the night was good nonetheless.

i ended up saying alot of things to eb which i really cant remember until now. she told me that i'll know whut i actually said if one day she really release a journal/book. now that will be a reason for me to be a supportive friend isnt it!ahahah.kidding.

oh yeah, i also
slept in the toilet :)

sunday went slow, i woke up really really late.
got up, fetch fu home and had dinner with jz and jn. the keyword is "dinner". can estimate my woke up time? ahahah. again, that night i wanted to go rantai merdeka event, but scrapped it cos laziness hits my head. jz and jn, whined about me for not bathing since a day before, so jn lend me a towel, i went bath, and jz lend me a shirt after that. i'll need to wash it and return to her soon. eb came visit us again that night. with jz out to drink with friends again, jn plan to visit her lover, i went home after having a short yam char session with both jn and eb at old town.

monday was very warm, jz,jn,kw, and me went to berbuka puasa with eb in j.u.s.t thai. kw treated us. right after the dinner eb left us to go perform her ramadhan prayer. jz,jn, kw and me walk around the mall for awhile, as usual, shoe hunting session for the ladies. then jz suggested us to catch a movie. we went to the cinema, the losers jn and kw who havent watch the dark knight chooses to watch dark knight. while me and jz went to watch Love Guru, was a decent movie, some scene did gave me and jz some good laugh. Love Guru finished earlier than Dark Knight, so i fetch jz back to her home. on the way, we saw an accident. where we saw this motionless guy (looks heavily injured, with blood all over his body) sitting in a disfigured proton wira. through the condition of the vehicle he's sitting in we figured that he had already passed. first time in my life i see this kinda thing.

back home, jz made herself and me her country's famous high end instant noodle ( as she claimed ) ahahha. the thing is, i have to eat with a spoon. cos her house only have one fork. simple calculation, 1 house, 1 fork, 2 person needed a fork = the girl will always get the fork. Ahahaha, but im not complaining tho, damn the instant noodle were good. oh yeah, i wash the dishes after that too. shaite. Ahahah.

Thats my long weekend, and now im at my office having my rare tuesday blue.

Kit "tuesday blu-er"

ps: oh yeah, maybe i am.