Wednesday, February 4, 2009

it strangled up my mind

Well. i need a break. officially. well, not a long one tho, i need 30 days. 30 days to clear my head. from all the problems that strangled up my mind. i'll write the letter soon. i'll leave that to Maggie's farm. i will fulfill the notice. and i will buy the ticket. i will buy the ticket to go to somewhere i think i will find peace. to stay awhile with a blank mind. i miss my blank mind. a mind so blank, that it cant even store my thoughts.

before i do so. i would clarify that. im not hiding from reality. im a person with visions and dreams. taking a risk in life doesnt count as hiding i guess. im taking a break from these ugly reality. for once. i just wanna say "fuck you reality, im goin off." to safe my head. cos its too cramped. i havent been able to sleep at night. a subconscious reaction towards bad dreams and nightmares.

and you, dont even dare judge me. dont you even dare say that im pessimist. i dont blame you. but dont you ever dare make remarks on my action, acting like you know me from inside out. act like you know what im going through. send me advices, treat me like im a fuckin child. you dont know me that well. i dont hate you. but i hate your remarks and words.

well. lets hope my trip upon a magic swirlin' ship can happen. let it happen.


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